Maryannaville™

Relationship Goals: Recognizing 7 Signs of Addictive Relationships

1. Dishonesty: Neither Sam nor Debbie talks about who they are or what’s really bothering them. They lie about what they want. This turns communication into an addictive relationship, which aren’t healthy relationship goals.

2. Unrealistic expectations: Both Sam and Debbie think the other will solve their self-esteem, body image, family, and existential problems. They believe the “right relationship” will make everything better. Yet, they’re in a disastrous addictive relationship, which won’t help them achieve their relationship goals.

3. Instant gratification: Sam expects Debbie to be there for him whenever he needs her; he needs her to make him happy immediately. He’s using her to make him feel good, and isn’t relating to her as a partner or even a human being. She’s a like drug that revolves around addictive relationships.

4. Compulsive control: Debbie has to act a certain way, or Sam will threaten to leave her. Both feel pressure to stay in this addictive relationship; neither feel like they’re together voluntarily. Neither are achieving their relationship goals.

5. Lack of trust: Neither partner trusts the other to be there when the chips are down. They don’t believe the other really loves them, and they don’t believe genuine caring or liking exists. At some level they know they’re not in a healthy relationship – but they may not know about addictive relationships.

6. Social isolation: Nobody else is invited into their relationship – not friends, family, or work acquaintances. People in addictive relationships want to be left alone, and may feel unprepared to achieve their relationship goals.

7. Cycle of pain: Sam and Debbie are trapped in a cycle of pleasure, pain, disillusionment, blaming, and reconnection. The cycle repeats itself until one partner breaks free of the addictive relationship to achieve healthier relationship goals.

Addictive relationships can change, if both partners are self-aware and are willing to do what it takes. In some cases an objective viewpoint (such as counseling) helps; other times, self-control and mutual accountability are all that’s needed to turn addictive relationships around.

*Note:
The circus we had here for too many years has safely arrived at its next stop. Moreover, it is with great hope that it will keep moving onward if and when its lease expires. We have other plans and don’t want it here taking up our resources anymore. More importantly is now that it’s well on its way, we have plenty of distance between us. Overall, the lesson in futility was a simple reminder that “it happens.” The lesson was a useful one. Its warrant became indicative that we needed to reevaluate our life’s function, purpose and goals and then not allow anyone or anything to disrupt said plans.

The year 2009 has been projected to fulfill greater hopes, higher expectations along with realistic dreams easily measurable with integrity, viability and culpability. The potential seen is endless. A plan is set to renovate immediately. We’re expecting a healthy R.O.I. instead of simply hoping that it works out well. Furthermore, this year is the year where we will see the law of reciprocity returned.

You maybe wanting to know more about this circus we mentioned and overall, there is nothing to say about it other than the interest we vested. what appeared to be a good thing turned into a major nightmare in more ways than one. As the ole saying goes, “it happened” although it was not anticipated by either party. The great news is that it has finally come to an end. We have learned very much from the experience and we are wiser because of it. On the same note, it is projected that in less than a month’s time we will be running full bore and at great lengths at a time. Our goals are in place and we are ready, willing and more able to reach the brass ring, if you will. We are fully determined to achieve our projected goals with pleasurably gainful insights, new friends alongside the daily joy of personal growth, achievement and rewards.

Originally posted 2009-01-05 15:51:00. Republished by Blog Post Promoter