Maryannaville™

The ole man is at home. He’s volunteered to play “house husband” so I left a list of things for him to do while I went out for a full day. He said that he thought housework was soooooooo easy to do. Therefore, I thought I would share the list of Honey Dos for you to see what had to be done and how he managed to get through the day on his day off from work without supervision. Included are the notes he left after each assigned chore:

• Make the beds. What a waste of time and effort, we’re only going to sleep in them again tonight. Forget that. Scratch one.

• Pick up dog poop in yard. It snowed last night, I don’t see any dog poop. Kids, do you see any dog poop?  Scratch two.

• Drop your pants off at the cleaners. Uh, I took a vacation day therefore, I don’t need them. Scratch three.

• This is easy, man, so what’s the fuss about, huh? Think I’ll grab another cup of coffee and get some computer time in for a while.

• Clean out Tupperware cabinet. Uhhh, now that one’s a hard one. Ooooh, I GOT IT! I’ll Velcro the door. That will keep them closed. Scratch four.

• Mop kitchen floor.The dog licked up that sugar spill from breakfast, floor looks clean to me. Scratch five. Good doggie, go play in the yard. (He loves rolling in the snow.)

• Find something fun for the kids to do. That tinfoil in the microwave thing was kinda fun. Scratch six. This is way too easy. I’ll have lots of time for the computer!

• Vacuum the carpets. That’s a hard one. Hey kids wanna have some more FUN? Scratch seven.

• Snack time. Hey gang, don’t you have a friend or two to visit? YESSSS! Scratch eight.

• Clean out hallway closet. Hmmmm, another hard one. That’s it! Take enough out of the closet to close the door. Outta sight, outta mind. Hmmmm, this other stuff can go under a bed. Scratch nine.

• Boy-O-Boy am I good! It’s lunch time. Pour some chili into the cracker bag and eat. Voila!  No lunch dishes !

• Do laundry. Ok, so nothing major. I can do the laundry while I’m on the computer. Scratch ten.

• Fold laundry…..(Dang, ‘ya know, I never noticed how many pink things this family actually wears! Gonna have to ask the little lady why she buys me pale pink underwear? Hey! Check this out! A cashmere Barbie sweater? Cool! Scratch eleven.

• Put the laundry away. Baskets in bedrooms work for me. Scratch twelve.

• Ah, man. This is just way too easy. Wonder why women always complain about house work?

• Water the plants. OOPS! Good thing the carpet is absorbent. Scratch thirteen.

• Grocery shopping. Buy toilet paper.These old newspapers will do, besides, that’s recycling and that’s good for the earth. We just went green. Scratch fourteen.

• Pick up the kids.Yeah right; we’re talking about my kids here. Parents will normally pay to drop them back off. They’ll be back. Scratch fifteen.

• Wonder who’s on ICQ? Awww, I have plenty of time to catch up with the latest.

• Make dinner. Easy! “Hello? I hear that you deliver. Ohhh double that. ‘We’ll need more dinner  for tomorrow.” Scratch sixteen.

• Clean out the dog house. Damn, the dog sleeps in our bed. Like that needs to be done! Scratch seventeen.

WOW! I got the list done in plenty of time to play on the ‘puter plus take a nap. Man, today was sooooo easy.

His conclusion: Women complain about house work just to make us guys think they work hard and have to also prove that they earn their keep.

*Bahhh!

Originally posted 2009-10-08 09:45:23. Republished by Blog Post Promoter